Every wise woman buildeth her house: but the foolish plucketh it down with her hands.
Proverbs 14:1 (KJV)
This verse has always conjured up a powerful word picture in my mind. I see a skilled woman wearing a tool belt and a hard hat. She’s got her tape measure and speed square and she knows how to use them.
She carefully pours footers and lays a strong cinderblock foundation. When she raises her walls, they’re straight and sure. Her house is sturdy and protects her family inside. Across the street is another woman. She’s not quite so skilled. Her house is not a home at all. It’s a pile of crumbled bricks and stone.
Instead of trying to build them up into a happy place for her family to live, she routinely tears them down.
Unfortunately, it can paint a picture of our lives as moms, too.
How to Apply Proverbs 14:1 to Motherhood
As moms, it is our job to build a home for our families. God gave us a nurturing spirit that our husbands just don’t have.
However, we sometimes allow our attitudes, pain, and discontent to bleed over into how we interact with our kids.
And instead of building up our families, we start to tear them down with our own hands slowly.
A Wise Woman Builds her House with Right Words
Our words affect our kids much more than we realize. When I think back to my childhood and teenage years, I have some very vivid memories of adults who said things that hurt me.
Most of the time they didn’t do it on purpose, and probably didn’t realize their words had such a permanent impact.
It’s so important for us to speak encouraging words to our kids that build them up. That doesn’t mean we never have to correct or discipline them.
It means we should always speak with kindness, even when we do have to say things we don’t want to say. Sometimes we’re faced with bad attitudes or disobedience, and we have to correct them.
But your kids will know when you do it with love.
“Let all your things be done with charity”. 1 Corinthians 16:14 KJV
A Wise Woman Leads by Example
The other day I heard one of my boys snap at the other. At first, I was frustrated at his attitude. But then, it hit me. He had heard me speak with that same tone.
I was ashamed that my boys were following my poor attitude example. Then, God convicted me that I can turn it around and encourage my kids in another way.
If they will follow my example for not-so-good behavior, they’ll follow me when I do right, too. It’s a powerful incentive for me to build my kids up by being a living example they can follow.
God called me to be their mom, and He has equipped me to be the mom they need.
“And let us consider one another to provoke unto love and to good works.” Hebrews 10:24 KJV
A Wise Woman Asks God for Wisdom to Build Her House
There are so many things I don’t know as a mom. I wish I had all the answers. But just when I think I’ve studied and know all the answers, the test questions change.
There’s a funny meme about how we all have our first child and think, “This is so easy! Why don’t we have another one?”
And then the second one is born and their personality is totally different. And we’re back at square one.
The more kids you have, the more you realize every one of them is different. What works with one does not work with the other. That’s why we must always seek God’s wisdom in every situation.
He promised us that if we ask Him, He will always give it.
“If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally, and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.” James 1:5 KJV
A Prayer from Proverbs 14:1
Lord, help me to be the mother who builds my children up. Help me not to tear them down with my words, attitudes, and actions. Give me the wisdom to follow you and be an example my kids can follow. Help me lead my children in the right way and build a strong family that honors You.
Guest Blogger Bio
Lyndsie is a child of God, wife, and stay-at-home mom to two boys whose names both start with J–and she usually can’t remember which is which. She’s the writer at The Flourishing Mama where she encourages moms to thrive in faith, family and home.